But, to my great chagrin, she persisted in her
refusal of everything, and changing her name, fled from Paris into the
provinces; where she was said to have joined a roving band of comedians.
Soon after that I was sent by my sovereign on several foreign missions
that kept me long away from France, and I lost all trace of her and you.
In vain were all my efforts to find you both, until at last I heard that
she was dead. Then I redoubled my diligence in the search for my little
motherless daughter, whom I had so tenderly loved; but all in vain. No
trace of her could I find. I heard, indeed, of many children among these
strolling companies, and carefully investigated each case that came
to my knowledge; but it always ended in disappointment. Several women,
indeed, tried to palm off their little girls upon me as my child, and
I had to be on my guard against fraud; but I never failed to sift the
matter thoroughly, even though I knew that deceit was intended, lest I
should unawares reject the dear little one I was so anxiously seeking.
At last I was almost forced to conclude that you too had perished; yet
a secret intuition always told me that you were still in the land of the
living. I used to sit for hours and think of how sweet and lovely you
were in infancy; how your little rosy fingers used to play with and pull
my long mustache--which was black then, my dear--when I leaned over to
kiss you in your cradle--recalling all your pretty, engaging little baby
tricks, remembering how fond and proud I was of you, and grieving over
the loss that I seemed to feel more and more acutely as the years went
on.
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