Unity of impression and dignity of thought are
gained by combining the sentences. (Yesterday was a pleasant day; so I
went to the park, where I saw many animals, and had a good time.)
+97. Coherence in the sentence is affected unfavorably by+--
1. _The wrong placing of modifiers_. (The victorious general was
returning to his native city after many hard-fought campaigns with his
staff officers.) It is not likely that the campaigns here referred
to were waged against the staff officers. By changing the position of
phrases we express the thought that the writer had in mind. (After many
hard-fought campaigns, the victorious general, with his staff officers,
was approaching his native city.) Especial care should be taken in placing
the correlatives _either, or; neither, nor; not only, but also;_ and the
word _only_. Incoherence frequently arises through the wrong placing of
these words.
2. _The careless use of pronouns_. (Argument plays a very little part in
that work, and those that do occur are not interesting.) (He repeated to
his father what he had told him the night before when he was in his room.)
In both sentences, the relation between pronouns and antecedents is not
clear, and incoherence results. With the ambiguity in the use of the
pronouns remedied, the sentences are entirely coherent. (Argument plays a
very little part in that work, and whatever argumentative material is
found is not interesting.
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